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-THQ Wireless (2005) -Played on a Motorola Razr
Summary: Worst… Star Wars game… ever. My Thoughts: Star Wars has seen its fair share of bad games over the years. Most of the Star Wars cell phone games are good examples of a poorly used license, save maybe for Battle Above Coruscant. But no game that I’ve played on a cell phone or a regular console can match the pure craptaculance of Lightsaber Combat. Lightsaber Combat is the worst Star Wars game of all. Actually, Lightsaber Combat barely even qualifies as a video game, although it tries to be a fighting game. We’ve seen Star Wars and fighting games together before with Masters of Teräs Käsi, which didn’t turn out so good, but Lightsaber Combat is infinite times worse. When you hear the name Lightsaber Combat you probably think of your favorite Jedi or Sith slicing things up with a colorful light sword. Or, maybe you think of lots of Jedi slicing stuff up, because there is more than one Jedi and one Sith Lord that can wield a mighty lightsaber. Well, in this game that’s all you get. You play as young Obi-Wan and fight Darth Maul. And then you fight Darth Maul again. And then again, but it might be against a different background. You do this over and over for as long as you can stand it or until you snap your phone in half for having played such a worthless game. The visuals are fine enough. Obi-wan and Maul look like they should…for all of the 16+ rounds that you’ll see them. There is a nice amount of blood spilled, which is surprising considering it’s a Star Wars game. The sound is truly terrible. You’re better off muting this if you hate yourself enough to have downloaded it. The controls are sincerely grotesque. All the moves are laid out on the number pad. Obi-Wan can swing his saber, block, crouch and jump, but it is all done without any finesse or care. Even though the animation looks decent, the characters move super slow and don’t always respond to your key presses. If you somehow manage to beat the ever-blocking Darth Maul, the final move of the round will be slicing him in half or chopping off his head. Then when the next round begins he will appear unscathed… and then the round after that and so on and so forth. Lightsaber Combat is not fun and is barely a game. If it hasn’t already, the Star Wars license must be wrest from THQ’s hand and given to a publisher that knows how to make good mobile phone games.
-Shawn
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Star Wars:
Lightsaber Combat
Score: